Royal pain in the ass...

photo:SSNN

Killing Baseballs

Insomnia sucks.
The upside is I can make* fun stuff like this to pass the time. It was a long night and I had a few brainstorms. This is one that was just as good of an idea at 3am, as it was at 6am.** So I went ahead and made it. I wanted to put Manny's number on it, but I keep forgetting that he wears Dodger Blue now. He was born to kill baseballs. Miss you Manny...
Good thing he wasn't the only killer on the roster.

*I did not make the zippered baseball, just the sox logo and text. When I remember where I got the ball I'll add a credit. It was a cool site, all the pics had zippers.
**Or the other way around

Pedey Did It...

Did you see the laser light show last night? "Pedroiah the Destroyah" got some work done and broke a record* or two for good measure. I love it when he shows off. Little D went 4-4 with 3 singles, a double, a sorta intentional walk, 3 runs, 4 RBIs, 2 stolen bases** and a partridge in a pear tree. Web Gems called to tell him to cut it out already, there were other guys that wanted face time. The kid can't help it.

Did you see the laser strike show last night? Dice K pitched a 2 walk, 2 hit, shutout. He reminded me why the Sox paid so much money just to talk to him. I think he is beginning to smell the beautiful scent of October air, and he wants more. The Right Sox certainly gave some. He hasn't lost since July 28th. In baseball years, that is a long time ago.

Big D, went 3-4. Papi got an RBI and 2 runs. I love to watch The Big Man swing. Youk*** and Bay both drove in 3 runs. Jacoby made a sick catch right off the, er... bat. You ask me, that was the true turning point of the game. Ells had his {offensive} game on and turned everyone else's on too. You know looking at that first play had to pump up the Men in Red. Varitek went 2-4, Cora 2-5. It was an outstanding game. It was fun, let's do it again!


*Pedroia now has 104 runs for a Sox 2nd basemen and Bobby Doerr doesn't... anymore. Pedey said "He didn't seem like the kind of guy that would be mad about it"
**Pedroia being Ellsbury
*** Youk took another one for the team. He must be sick and tired of getting beaned.
PS. Dustin was playing "scruffless" last night. He cleaned up his version of facial hair. I'm betting his wife made him shave. :~)

Surviving Katrina, The Facts

on August 29th 2005, I survived hurricane Katrina. My house was destroyed and I lost nearly everything in it. That was 3 years ago today. I chose not to evacuate and for that you may call me a fool. The reason why so many did not evacuate is simple. We could not afford it... again. Evacuating your home is expensive. You can also lose your job. The Gulf Coast is a tourist town. Employers there, generally use the "no fault" policy. Basically they don't care why you called off, they do not require, nor will they accept, an excuse from a doctor. There are a set number of times that you can miss work in a set period of time. If you exceed that number, you are unemployed. Simple as that.

Evacuation is expensive, stressful, dangerous and time consuming. The simple fact is, so many stayed behind because of those 4 reasons. We had already fled so many times that year, we all became weary and a bit jaded. No one expected Katrina to become the monster it did. On the coast, every storm was compared to Camille. The weathermen even say it. "This won't be a Camille" Katrina tuned out to be much worse than Camille. Gas was getting very expensive,{gas stations on the coast quickly inflate prices to unbelievable prices. They come back down very slowly} hotel rooms {holiday weekend} were in short supply and those that could be had, were as far away as Memphis and that is very long drive in bumper to bumper traffic and 100 degree weather. So we stayed... and paid.

Katrina was not the first hurricane in the Gulf of Mexico in 2005.

There were 27 named storms that year, {a record}

15 of them were hurricanes. This exceeded the 1969* record of 12 hurricanes.

7 of these 15 hurricanes were major hurricanes.

Of those 7, an unprecedented 4 reached category 5 status.

Emily

Katrina

Rita

Wilma
{The 2 years before Katrina, Isabel and Ivan were cat5}

By the time Katrina hit Mississippi, we had already evacuated 3 times in just over 2 months!

Arlene 6/11/05

Cindy 7/5/05 {notice this is a holiday weekend}

Dennis 7/09/05 Category 3 {again, notice the date}

Katrina 8/29/05 Cat 5 {This was just before Labor Day weekend.}

The storm surge caused severe damage along the Gulf Coast, devastating the Mississippi cities of

Waveland

Bay St. Louis

Pass Christian

Long Beach

Gulfport

Biloxi**

D'Iberville

Ocean Springs

Gautier***

Moss Point

Pascagoula

The Mississippi and Alabama coastlines suffered catastrophic damage from the storm's 30-foot (9 m) storm surge.

New Orleans escaped the worst damage from the storm.

The levees along the Gulf Intracoastal Waterway and 17th Street and London Avenue Canals ultimately were breached by storm surge, flooding about 80% of the city. 1,836 people have been confirmed dead across 7 US states. Katrina is the costliest and one of the deadliest natural disasters in U.S. history, with damage totals around $81.2 billion

I know that this seems like a very emotionless account of one of our nation's greatest catastrophes. Would you like to read about how the wind sounded like a woman being murdered for 10 hours straight? What it feels like when the roof comes off the house? What the Mississippi Sound smells like when it is 4 feet deep in your windowless bathroom? {and coming over the edge of the tub where I sought refuge?} How about what bricks feel like when they hit your body? Would you like to read that at times, all I could hear was my heart pounding in my ears? Others times it was glass smashing, metal crumbling, wood splintering, water gushing. Neighbors screaming for help, for mercy... for it to just stop. And then it did. All at once. Just for a little while. Then it started all over again.

It's easier to think about the facts than the emotion of it. 3 years is not far enough away from the terror for me to be able to go into the emotion. I can tell you that the gulf coast of MS. was beautiful. It was a world away from the redneck stereotypes. It was a beach town, where shrimping, gambling and football was local religion. I wasn't born there but it was easy to claim as my own. I like wearing shorts and sandals in December! Some complained that they liked 4 seasons and we don't have that. Oh, but we do! Almost summer, summer, still summer and Christmas Day.

I'm marking this anniversary by drinking beer {nipping on bourbon} wearing my tshirt that says: I survived Katrina and all I got was this stinking shirt from FEMA, and watching Gustav follow a terrifying familiar path in the Gulf of Mexico. I'm sending all my prayers and keeping my toes and fingers crossed. But I'm not placing any bets. I'm very afraid for the coast. If the worst does happen, do the survivors a favor. Find a way to donate money or supplies without going through the Red Cross. Trust me on this. Give your aid to the local churches. They are the only ones helping the survivors in any real or meaningful way. The only sign of the Red Cross in the first month after Katrina was one meals on wheels truck. You had to go to it, if you could find it. That's enough BWI for now...

* The year of Camille

** Where I lived

*** This is pronounced go-shay

Papi Did It...

The house that Ruth built...

The House Big Papi TORE DOWN.

Just so you know, I have nothing against the building. It's the fans I can't stand. Let's keep the stadium and replace the morons who "boo" their own team and leave in the 7th.

In Case You Wondered

Jacoby Ellsbury has the last ball, from the last game played at Yankee Staudium, between the Red Sox and the Yankees. Aren't you glad 'roid boy in the pornstach doesn't? I am.

Cooperstown has probably already asked Ells to give up the ball, for the good of all mankind. He probably has, with one of his slow, easy grins. I doubt Ells would demand payment in return for a piece of history. {You know who I'm referring to, don't make me try and spell the name.}

Way to go, Ells. You were born to wear Red Sox.

Photo courtesy of Kelly at Sittingstill

Turn Turn Turn

What's on TV tonight?

HBO: Real Sports With Bryant Gumbel

NBC: NFL PRE season Football Jags v Skins

CBS: NFL PRE season Football Panthers v Steelers

ABC: Ugly Betty {repeat}

FOX: NFL PRE season Football Panthers v Steelers <-NOT a typo! Same game 2 different channels.

ESPN: College Football NC State v South Carolina

ESPN2: College Football Oregon v Stanford

FSNSouth: College Football Wake Forest v Baylor

WGN: Baseball Phillies v Cubs {National League}

SportsSouth: Baseball Marlins v Braves {National League}

ESPNU: College Football Vanderbilt v Miami Ohio

CSTV: College Football Florida v Kentucky {from 2007... seriously}

Fox Sports Atlantic: High School Football. {This SO makes my rant understandable}

About 12 channels airing the Democratic National Convention

One of my biggest rants has always been airing other sports during baseball season. You know, baseball? The national past time? Google "National Past Time" I'm betting it will come back with 3 gajillion pages of baseball, not football or basketball, etc. Summertime IS baseball. Today is August 29th 2008* I know because I checked a dozen times while I looked at the tv guide in amazement. It's the dog days of August, the middle of hurricane season, the height of SUMMER and there are 10 football games on.** There are only 2 baseball games on and they are both National League Games.*** As my dearly departed Gram would say "What the HELL is happening to this country?" It's anarchy, I tell you! I bet a good portion of you complain when Christmas decorations go up and carols are piped through the PA system before Halloween. It's the same thing. It's the apocalypse. It goes against the natural order of things! It's like the song says "To everything there is a season, under Heaven"**** The bottom line is this: It's time for baseball. All the other sports should wait their turn. { I really can't help it. I love puns}


*One year ago tomorrow I survived hurricane Katrina. Sorta feels like a 2nd birthday. But not the fun kind with presents and beer.
**Bryant Gumbel on Home Box Office talking about sports is a whole 'nother profanity laced rant.
*** National League doesn't even begin to count until The World Series.
**** The lyrics to this song called "Turn, Turn, Turn" by the Byrds can actually be found in the bible.

Beaned Town

What? It's just not a Yankees/Red Sox game until a Yankee pitcher hits Kevin Youkilis?* Makes me wonder if there is a tally sheet taped to the wall in the Yankees clubhouse. I wonder how many times Youk has been hit a.) by a Yankee pitcher and b.) in Yankee stadium? Too be fair, Mussina beaned Alex Cora as well. The following inning {6th for those of you who care} Lester hit Johnny Damon up high. But it wasn't retaliation. The Yankee announcers even said so. They are absolutely unbiased and you can believe everything they say, right? ...And they call Boston Beantown, huh.

*The picture is not from today's game. MLB.tv got wise and I can't screen cap live. I googled for the picture and was amazed at how many pictures of Youk getting hit there are out there.

Get out of my head... revisited

The Squeeze "Tempted by the fruit of another". Someone is using this song in their commercial. It was never a big favorite of mine, but it's got a good beat that lends itself to head bopability.* I always seem to get these songs stuck in my head when there is no chance of hearing any other music for some time, so, the song can not be replaced by another. It's really not fair.


Bopability: The overwhelming urge to move one's head {in this case} in time to the beat of a song. The bop urge is most often felt in the dominate foot. Manifesting itself as toetapping. A close cousin to this involuntary reaction is the urge to speak "Turn it up" at the beginning of a popular Lynard Skynard song.

The End Of The Evil Empire

History is not transferable. When the New York Yankees quit their stadium at the end of the season and move across the street, the history is gone with the "old" Yankee Stadium". Like they say, "You can't take it with you". The Yankees will have to start over. The "New" Yankee Stadium will not be the "House That Ruth Built"* It will not be where Roger Maris** hit 61 single season home runs. {That record still stands. McGuire and Bonds cheated when they used steroids}It will not be where the Yankees claimed umpteen World Series titles. All of that will be gone. It will be the 2009 Yankees in a new stadium with zero history or character. The Yankee myth and legend will be torn down with the old building. How sad. I'm surprised that it isn't going to be called Stienbrenner Stadium. How much did he pay to build it? Most of all, I feel sorry for Derek Jeter***. He should be allowed to retire in Yankee Stadium. I believe he deserves that, at least. He is getting ripped of. Who ever made {a mess out of }the 2008 schedule missed a beautiful opportunity. The last game in Yankee Stadium should have been against the Red Sox, not the Orioles. It started with the Red Sox on April 28th 1923, the first game ever played in Yankee Stadium. {we lost} It should have ended that way. I can't help but wonder if "someone" got nervous and decided it would not be good to lose to the Sox in their last game in the old place. The start of a curse? Forgive me but I'm a dyed in the womb Sox fan. I BELIEVE in curses. The Yankees may be cursed anyway. They have almost no hope at making it to the post season and that is what they will carry into the new building, and new season. I'm sure at some point next summer, when the Yankees find themselves in the cellar, the fans { for reasons I will never understand, boo their own team} will whisper CURSE. So it will begin.

In the mean time, the Sox take the first 2 of a 3 game stand for the last time at this stadium. The Yankees gave up early tonight. Sox slug away and stretch runs. Our future captain, {the 9 foot tall } Dustin Pedroia, hits a grand slam. {11-2 goodguys} The Yankee "faithful" head for the exit's in the 8th, like rats abandoning a sinking ship. The Sox fans loudly cheer for their boys. It feels like the Yankees gave up on the season, long ago. They are just going through the motions. Waiting for next year. This is not the way the last year at the stadium should be played. I bet their "legends" are very, very angry tonight. Even the overly biased announcers can think of very little to say about the Yankees that is positive. They have been forced to recognize the Sox as the superior team. Hell has actually frozen over.**** Turns out, it's a good thing. So in the end, the "evil empire" is no more. Those who sold out to the dark side, long for the light.***** The "good guys" win again. The Red Sox are Forever...

* Am I the only one that gets a kick out of the fact that a Red Sox player "built" Yankee stadium? The Babe was ours first. The Sox grow legends, the Yankees buy them.

** Roger Maris was born to wear Red Sox, he just got a rotten deal and ended up with the Yankees.

*** Also born to wear Red Sox. Too bad he ended up with the Yankees. He and Maris are proof that the Gods Of Baseball do indeed get drunk on occasion and make stupid bets. {See Kevin Millar.}

**** It's true! I called Joe Morgan, he says it's froze solid where he is and he's glad he didn't work the game tonight. He is pretty sure he couldn't think of something nice to say about the Red Sox to save his life.

***** Are you there Johnny? It's me, Jaid~

The Beginning Of The End

Red Sox open a 3 game stand at Yankee Stadium tonight. Tim Wakefield against Andy Pettitte. It's the bottom of the fifth, the Yankees are losing 6 -2. The Yankees have complained about every single thing already tonight. I would say that they look like little leaguers out there, but that would be an insult to little leaguers. Johnny Damon is the only reason they are still in this game. Huh, looks like John can't help but hit homers in Yankee Stadium, no matter what color his uniform is. Pettitte is arguing the strike zone, Molina is arguing interference and Giambi is playing like an idiot at first base, letting runs in while he argues. He still has that ridiculous looking pornstach on his lip. Somebody should tell him that everyone is laughing at him.
The Yankee fans are booing Arod, nothing new there. He is playing a lazy third base and can't hit Wake. The Red Sox are playing with bench warmers and call ups, the injury bug is stalking the club house. I'm amazed the Red Sox have held onto second place with the illness, injuries and brutal travel schedule. Makes me wonder where we would be if we had not started the year at a disadvantage. Regardless, the Sox have had an awesome season and they should finish with a division win or wild card. It's all good. They will go on to win another World Series. No question. No doubt. No problem. We plan on making a habit of it. I'm just sayin'...

Gratuitous Varitek

A picture of Jason Varitek because:
1. He looks really good
2. You are about to see something completely hideous in the next post, Tek will make it easier for you to deal with it.
3. He looks really, really good.
4. See numbers one and three, repeat as needed.

I heart Tek, don't you?

Is Andy Insane?

Andy Pettitte looks insane. Did you ever really take a look at his eyes? You think it's the steroids?

Uh-huh, remember he was juicing and that's apparently OK. It's not like anyone got punished. Roger Clemons probably won't get to the Hall of Fame in a big hurry, but there was no real fall out. The clear message is this: Just don't get caught, but if you do it's OK, just don't get caught again.

ESPN Hates MLB

Anyone else notice that ESPN hates Major League Baseball? The American league, in particular. It seems that since baseball season started ESPN has aired any sport but baseball. ESPN loves basketball, preseason football*, college football, NASCAR, regular season football, tiddlywinks... not baseball. They might air a game, maybe two a week. Chances are, that game is going to be a National League game. ESPN seems to like the Braves. The problem with that, for me is this: The Braves already have their own network. It's always fun when the Braves play the Reds, who also have their own network, it means I can ignore it on 3 different channels.
what ESPN really loves is basketball. They air 2-3 games a day during the season. {The NBA has the longest season I've ever seen. Is it necessary to play 11 months out of a year? I think not.} Football has a relatively short season, it just seems to take forever. I think it's all the complaining they do. They play one a game a week and bitch about it for the next 6 days. Sissys

ESPN, ESPN2 and the so called FOX Sports networks, suck. They ignore baseball all season and then pay through the nose for the right to broadcast the playoff and World Series games,and screw it up. Joe Morgan is a biased moron. Most of the hasbeens and neverweres that the sports networks hire to "announce" the games have no clue as to what it going on. I watched a Red Sox - Angels game and Morgan spent the whole afternoon talking about the Yankees. WTF???

I'm ranting about this because I just saw the broadcast schedule for the NBA on ESPN. Preseason football {instead of baseball} has been on every sports network, every night for the last few weeks. My post season aggravation is starting early this year.

*Preseason football is the equivalent of spring training baseball. I don't remember ESPN airing any spring training games. I had to watch them online, just like I have with the bulk of the regular season games, because... ESPN hates baseball.

Get out of my head!

10 cc. "I'm Not In Love"
It's stuck in my head. It's been stuck for days. My friend swears Crisco will work. I'm afraid to ask, so we can both just wonder. If you don't know this song, you didn't grow up in the 70's.* I was told once that if you get a song stuck in your head, sing it to some unsuspecting fool**, it will transfer {like magic} from your head to theirs, thus becoming their problem.

* Or maybe you did but smoked so much mother nature you just can't place it. Here is a hint: big boys don't cry, big boys don't cry, big boys don't cry.
**The jerk in front of you at 7-11 paying with pennies is a good target. In fact, even if you don't have a song stuck in your head, pick a really insidious one just as punishment. Barry Manilow's "Even Now" is good. Or the theme from Gilligan's Island. Did you know the words to that song can be sung to "Stairway To Heaven"? Did I mention I grew up in the 70's?

Blackouts

I missed the whole series against Baltimore. You know, the one where Tek hit a couple of homers and real nifty double? Uh-huh, that one. I was blacked out. Before you begin to wonder about just how much beer I was enjoying, let me be clear. MLB.COM blacked me out. Why? Because I live close enough to Baltimore to purchase a ticket and put my fanny in a seat. I went to Map quest and fed it the start and end info, this is what it spit out: Estimated Time: 8.0 hours 15 minutes Estimated Distance: 488.87 miles. I currently reside in North {Sweet} Carolina {Ba-Ba-Ba} tho, not by choice*. In fact, I live close enough to South Carolina, I could spit at it, and sometimes do. So, counting NC, Va, and driving through {i.e. all the way around!} D.C. Camden Yards is like 3 States away! 8 hours and 15 minutes, does not include, potty and fuel stops, food stops, detours, road {de}construction and all the the other crap that goes with 8 hour car trips. What it also does not take into consideration is THE TRIP BACK! THE TIME IT TAKES TO PLAY THE GAME AND THE FACT THAT I WILL HAVE TO DO IT 3 DAYS IN A ROW!!! I pay for Internet service, I pay to "watch every game, every day, everywhere" {that's what they say} in fine print it says "subject to black out". I understand that there is money to be made by having fans come out to the park. I understand that stations like FOX and ESPN want exclusivity rights to broadcast games. I'm OK with that. I'm not OK with being blacked out of nearly every game played on the East Coast. Oh yeah, you read that right. The teams I am blacked out for: Baltimore, Cincinnati, Washington DC and Atlanta. That is nearly every team on the Eastern Seaboard. The good news is, all of them but Baltimore are National League and they don't count until October. Here is how it works. MLB.TV takes my money and I get to watch my beloved Red Sox games on a small computer screen. Sometimes, the games are on ESPN, Fox or one of the Big 3 Networks. That is a BONUS! Yeah!! Sox on the big screen! Never mind the irony**

I'm still paying to watch online but it's OK, it's on the TV!! Only sometimes, FOX, ESPN, etc, buys the right to broadcast the game, but they don't air it. Or, they do, just not in my area. This falls under "regional broadcast". So, the last 3 days the Red Sox played in Baltimore and I {got to see preseason football, eeew} could not see it online OR on the TV because I live within driving distance to Camden Yards. :~)

Let's review: I'm paying {through the nose} for cable, Internet service and MLB.COM. I did NOT see the whole Baltimore series that I paid for twice because I was blacked out. Blacked out because Baltimore is within driving distance from where I live. Here, I'll draw you a picture:
Oh yeah, I'm pissed. Wouldn't you be?
*I'm not incarcerated or anything. I can leave when ever I want. It's just that we do, what we do, for those we love. Love brought me here. It could be worse.

** I have a pretty big TV, I have a fairly small monitor. 90% of my visual entertainment is baseball online, 10% is Lost, Grey's and CSI {and soon Fringe} on the television. Please note that all of these shows are on Thursday. WTF is up with that???

Bay starts a fire....

Today Papi was being Jacoby, Dice K was being Becks and Mike was being Mike. I found out that Mike Lowell has bone spurs in his hip. YOWZA!! That has got to hurt. You know Mike tho... he is still there, grinding it out. Papi stole second base and got a laugh later when he started eyeing third. I heart Papi. Dice K is having an outstanding day, his pitch count is high but he looks better than I have seen him in a long time.

The girls at Fenway are already in love with Jason Bay. I'm enjoying reading all the "Bay" signs in the bleachers. I was blown away with the standing ovation the Nation gave Bay as he walked up for his first at bat. A standing ovation. Any way you cut it, the Fenway Faithful are a classy bunch. I can't help but wonder how he would have been received at Yankee Stadium. What if he had replace Jeter, for example. I'm thinking it would have been more of a Bronx cheer.

So the game goes into a rain delay with Varitek at bat... with a full count. Crap. That seems so unfair. At least the Red Sox are winning. It's 5-2. I remember sitting through a rain delay as a kid. A couple of the players took their cleats off and went out to have some fun sliding around on the tarp. They pantomimed pitching and hitting, stealing second head first and scoring the winning run. They were soaked through and having a ball. I remember every minute of that delay but couldn't tell you who won the game or what the score was. Huh, that was 30 years ago.... but, damn. Now I feel old.

Bay found out why the boys in red socks take off their batting helmet before returning to the dug out after a run. {I'm pretty sure there should be a comma someplace in that sentence}
"...you get pounded in the head pretty good. I took that thing off immediately when I got there," Bay said. "We just have a tendency to get people in the head when they don't take off their helmet," said catcher Jason Varitek.
Jed Lowrey might be an Athletics killer. In the first two games he went 4-7. The combination of Bay and Lowrey has worked out phenomenally well these last two games and it has continued today. Ells and Tek are climbing out of their slumps and Tito might move Jacoby back to the top of the order very soon.

Delay is over and we are back to soxball. Oki is in to relieve Dice K. Top of the seventh inning. Oki has really struggled this season. I sure hope he can figure out how to get the magic back. We really miss it. Btw.. the lady sitting behind home plate must be on her third ice cream cone. That or it's taking her forever to finish it. I'm really jonesing for some ice cream... see ya.